One of the first things you learn when you enter the kink community is that definitions, like both gender and sexuality, can be fluid. A term that means one thing to one person can mean something rather different to someone else. A good example of this are the terms top and domme. Generally, a top…
Category: Posts
Gentle Femdom and Role Reversal? What’s the Difference, Anyway?
If you’re into sweet and loving femdom, you might be familiar with both the terms gentle femdom and role reversal. You might think these are the same things. Isn’t femdom a role reversal by definition in a world where we still tend to see men as sexual aggressors and leaders and women as less sexually…
Five Not So Kinky but Hopefully Helpful Tips to Remember When Attending Your First Munch
Okay. So, you found Fetlife, and you discovered there’s this entire world of kinky people out there! Which also means there’s an entire world of kinky submissive guys who want to be dominated and kinky femdommes who want to do it! But how do you meet these people? Are you really going to have to…
Domme Bites: Why Are Pro-Dommes So Expensive?
Someone got a little testy about the price of pro-dommes in his area in Dan Savage’s column. He wanted to know why professional dominatrixes (dominatrices) in his area were so expensive. (Um, because it’s hard work?????) Dan let the professionals answer his question. Check out their responses here. Like my blog? Follow me on…
How to Make It Through Your First Femdom Scene Feeling Like a Powerful Domme: Part Three
In the second part of this three-article series about setting up your first femdom scene, I talked about magic blindfolds, the importance of aftercare and discovering your domme archetype. Let’s press on to the third and final article. I hope after you finish, you’ll feel ready to kick ass…and maybe have yours kissed too. Another…
How to Make It Through Your First Femdom Scene Feeling Like a Powerful Domme: Part Two
In the first part of this three-part series about setting up your first femdom scene, I discussed my first scene and how nervous I felt about living up to my bottom’s expectations. I also talked about negotiation and consent and the importance of communication with your partner. One of the most helpful pieces of advice…
How to Make It Through Your First Femdom Scene Feeling Like a Powerful Domme: Part One
I remember it clearly. Here was this man I was very into. He wasn’t my submissive. We were just getting to know each other. But we’d made out, quite passionately I might add. We’d had a little light play at a kink event in public. And we agreed that we were going to meet up…
Lifestyle Dommes, Dominatrixes and Pro-Dommes? Learning the Ropes.
When you’re just dipping your toes into the world of kink, there are certain terms that can be confusing. Sometimes you can feel like people are speaking a special language, and you haven’t learned it yet. One example of this is the differences between the terms lifestyle domme, dominatrix and pro-domme. A domme is simply…
Domme Bites: 2019. The Year of the Femdom
Pornhub released their statistics about who was searching for what kind of porn during the past year. And it turns out that femdom made the most popular list, coming in at number 10, right under ASMR. ASMR porn? What have I been missing? In other news, women in Pennsylvania and Oregon seem to like their…
An Inside Look at Gentle Femdom. Cuddles With a Side of Control.
Most people who hear the word “femdom” initially have a specific image in mind. Usually, it’s of a beautiful, tall, stern woman in five inch boots sneering down at a man on the ground and degrading him by calling him humiliating names or “forcing” him to commit potentially demeaning acts like licking her boots or…