When I first got into the kink Scene I spent a lot of time of thinking about what I WAS. I mean this mostly in the sense that when you join Fetlife, you’re asked to choose a role, and since people I met were going to be seeing my Fetlife profile, I felt I needed something to label myself.
After my last very theoretical discussion about ethics and trans women and sex work, let’s get back to basics. I am basically a top. Now, there are several ways we use the words “top” and “bottom” related to sex. Some people use the words to say who is doing the penetrating and getting penetrated. That’s …
The term service top seems to get kind of a bad rap in the kink Scene. You don’t see a many people advertising themselves as one, maybe because it doesn’t seem as sexy as being a “big, bad dominant!” Also, some people don’t even know what a service top is or might have a misconception …
One of the first things you learn when you enter the kink community is that definitions, like both gender and sexuality, can be fluid. A term that means one thing to one person can mean something rather different to someone else. A good example of this are the terms top and domme. Generally, a top …
